I just watched Whoopi Goldberg onthe Pierce Morgan Show(or is it Pierce Morgan Tonight?) on CNN. I like her, I mean who doesn’t like Sister Act? But she just said stuff that really surprised and touched me, in a sweet, positive and grateful way.
I can’t remember her exact words but Pierce was asking her about dating and she said that she’s not really that type who “dates”. She’s more of the “singular” person (funny choice of words) and so Pierce asked her, “so do you ever get lonely”. She then answered no but that she tries to (you know have those “moments”) but she said that she’s just really happy. And this is the part that struck me. She said something like she just has so many people around her, in her life, that she loves and admires. Does she want them to be with her or live with her, she said “HELL NO!”. Some of them are married, some are not. But she said that she’s fine with just loving them from where she is, something like that.
I’ve never heard that from Oprah or Dr. Phil but that is one insight that I never expected I’d hear from Whoopi Goldberg! That is such a great thing which again just confirms what I said before that love is just about giving. It starts and ends at that. There is no waiting for a return.
I think looking back now, I’m more grateful and appreciative of the people whom God gave me to really practice love on by allowing them not to love me back. In high school (or well yeah, even in adult life haha) that is such a big deal and a lot of hearts got broken because we’re so caught up with that pain of not having that ONE person that we want for ourselves. I think if you ask every girl, her story will always include that one guy that she just can’t have. Of course, for some love stories, it ends happily with the girl eventually getting that guy in the end. Unfortunately for some, it’s been a sad story that keeps on repeating with almost every guy you meet that you just can’t have.
I think that the lesson, and I will tell this to my lovely daughters (by faith, with “s” haha) someday that we are allowed to like guys but we have to remember that not all of them serve the same purpose as what we have in mind than with what God has in mind. Because girls are just girls, we all want and wish for the same purpose for guys that we like. We want them to be our groom! From our first crush to our first love (puppy love) to our first true love (this is the second actually), then to our first long relationship (real love this time or so we say but it’s really the third already). I think girls just love all these firsts and ideals in our minds to the extent that we twist definitions just so the person we like could fit into our dreams.
Ah, but look at that insight from Whoopi. I am so happy to hear that from a woman like whoah, Whoopi Goldberg! Those people around her are so blessed to have her love.
It also made me realize that there are great lessons that can be learned only when we are not with the people we love, not just physically but like in reality just cannot be with them. There are also so many good things that can come out from being apart than being together, right? Like old lovers that became really good friends, hm like Vic Sotto and Dina Bonnevi? Haha, I can’t think of anyone right now.
Like when you’re together, you claim you love each other but all you do is fight and tear down each other but when you’re not together you just focus on giving. Of course marriage, in reality, is entirely a different thing, that involves a lot of fights as well but it’s not meant to be given up just because of those fights. Haha
Moving on, another equally important thing that Whoopi said that struck me also was about her not condeming Michael Phelps for smoking pot (or was it weed? I don’t even know the differnce). I am not even aware of the story or if it’s true or what not. But that’s irrelevant. What matters to me is what Whoopi said about her being okay with what Michael did because he did it at home. If he did it in public, because of who he is, that’s a different story. But he was at home. And Whoopi was like, she understood. Every person, even the most successful person in this world, experiences bad times just like anyone else. It’s like she gets it that it doesn’t matter whether you’re a public figure or not, you experience pain just the same. And here’s what struck me the most. She said, all these people condemning or saying you should do this or you shouldn’t do this because you’re a role model to the children, listen she said. Michael is not required to be the children’s role model, the children’s role model should be their parents but even parents can’t live up to that and so they point their fingers to someone else.
I’m not yet a parent but in my life, I think it applies just the same. Who am I really to judge someone else’s life? Am I their maker? Am I the one who orchestrated the environment that they grew up with, the people they met who loved them or hurt them, I mean who’s to say?
This reminded me of what Cito Beltran also said in his talk when he went to Los Banos and I was still in college back then. He said, “Do not judge the person whose life you’ve never lived”. So true! That includes all the past presidents. How can you judge them, have you been a president? And even if you have, you still didn’t become president at the same time and set of circumstances as him or her. I mean, in the same way, that I don’t want to be judged when I mess up right? Like how horrible I must feel to hear people speculate about my decisions, or my choices when I feel like they don’t have any right to because they’re not the ones in my shoes.
Love is about giving with no expectation of returns. Love is not even an investment. I mean yes, I understand how sometimes people say that you just invest that seed and it will grow, like for parents to just love their problem child or to a battered wife who longs that someday her husband is going to change because of her love. Okay so these are different topics altogether but to be brief, I still say that’s the wrong way of seeing things. Even when a person doesn’t change in his lifetime or in your lifetime, that is beside the point. You shouldn’t be disappointed or say like you did your best but this and that. There shouldn’t be any “buts”. You just love. You just give. And that ends there. The outcome is not up to you. And that applies as well to your enemies. To my enemies (wohoooo), to people that I lack patience with or just have none at all. Love just gives. Whether I understand or cannot comprehend why people or systems in the governement are just incompetent and inefficient and just horrible. I don’t need to understand why. That is irrelevant. To love is just to give.
Whoah, who would have thought I’d get some love lessons tonight. And from out of all the million people in the world, I’d get it from Whoopi Goldberg?! Yeah yeah!
Fantastic. Funny, awesome God.
